An Update!

Well, back in the swing of things. I can't say I'm too terribly excited after my amazing last few summer weeks. My life was pure bliss. Seriously it doesn't get better than that. *sigh* Now, to new endeavors, which I am excited about, but once again the wheels are back to grinding, non-stop. I have actually started drinking mocha frappucino's on the days I have to get up early. Can you believe that? I hate coffee, I hate chocolate, and I don't drink caffeine. I think it's just a sign of what's to come.
My classes are as always thought provoking, inspiring, and considerably challenging. I am a course mentor for a sociology class (the study of religion) and I just read my first set of papers. Wow, talk about exhausting, but enthralling as well. It was incredible to read about such a personal topic through someone's heart on paper. People's self disclosure level was abundant compared to the level of verbal discussion in class. It was really something. It was also interesting and entertaining to read people's personalities transcend on paper. I didn't realize how much 'voice' these students had! Really, I am just excited about my class. I loved the material when I took the course as a student, and I am learning a ton more reading the same material but thinking about it in a different way. Religion is just one of those things that we really rarely get to discuss with such intensity and diversity, but this class has that ability. It is astonishing to watch, really. If anything, being a course mentor only solidifies my desires for teaching! It is totally me.
In other areas of study, I am also a student in the study of stratification. If there is any class that derives more passion, guts, and piss and vinegar in my heart, it is this issue. Wes is taking an economics class and he often times comes back from class telling me the rhetoric of his economics teacher, which every time so far has felt like a bee stinging me over and over again down my esophoagus. That is how much I despise his words. I know that I am a socialist. I have always been one. My environment that I was exposed to programmed me that way, and although I never knew I was one then, I have felt the words of sociology cling to my heart like a child to their security. Unfortunately saying the word, 'socialist' in front of non-sociologists usually elicits strong ick factor, kind of like the word 'union' or 'bitch'. hehe. Uhm, yeah. I am wondering if there is going to be something I identify myself as that is not in the minority status. I guess not. What is not surprising to me, but always disappointing is that usually the people who cringe when I speak the word social anything are the people who actually would be embraced by its reform. I guess media and pop culture has done a fine job twisting its hegemonic ideal around on people. I really see it as this..... We see slaves in the field being beaten, abused, neglected, and starved for the capital of someone else. These slaves who so desperately want to be out of their situation, who would do almost anything to be reunited with their family and their culture, are slowly, or I suppose not so slowly being eroded and erased from humanity. However, a new posse comes into town and says, 'Hey! You don't have to do that anymore. You don't have to live like this. You can be free.' And the slaves reply, 'But we ARE free. I can go to this side of field or to this side of the field on my own accord.' Do you get where I'm going with this? It is mind-blowing and frightening to hear certain people's responses to the economic inequality that our luxurious country produces. My friend who is in a terrible position with his job said, 'Well the economy might not do as well with a democratic leader.' Uhm, hellllllo? Where have you been? Yeah the economy's doing record breakingly well, but the distribution of wealth across our nation has gotten record breakingly devastating. Did you know that there has been a 9% annual income increase for middle - class people over the past TWENTY years. I guess that doesn't sound too bad, does it? At least it's going up, right? Well, considering the market is off the flipping charts you have to wonder where that money's going... Did you know that the elite 1%'s annual income in that time span has increased 140%? That is 23 times the income of the middle class worker. And forget about the poor. They don't even count... The stats are 500:1 for a CEO and it's bottomless manager... (http://www.motherjones.com/commentary/columns/2003/11/ma_575_01.html)
I don't know... You be the judge, but this is the kind of stuff I am learning about in school. Needless to say I miss summer.

McNair.... McNair so far is going surprisingly easy for me. I think since I should have taken this course work ohhhh about a year ago, it will help me if I don't get into a graduate school this year, but really, that's worst case scenario and definitely NOT what we are hoping for. McNair is just stressful in that it primes the word graduate school, which primes the word STRESS over and over in my head, giving me a headache. I have taken up kickboxing again and it's not surprising to me why I need to kick the shit out of something for a good hour everyday. But at least the course work is helpful and organizational; something I desperately need in this process. If I were to pray, I would pray a lot to get into a school with the funding I desire and the location that keeps me near my family. That is asking for a lot. Not likely going to happen, but never going to not hope for it. I feel good though when I'm in class because at least it's a symbol, for myself, that I am doing something right, and that there are people who believe in me who have been there and want me to succeed.

Psych... So I am taking the most boring class psychology has to offer (besides 101), and it is utterly painful sitting in class listening to my lispy teacher call on his students (at random) to see if we can recite what he just said. He must have experience with students falling asleep during his lecture. Of course, it's my first and earliest class of the day which happens to last an hour and fifteen painful minutes. (And yes, that last twenty minutes is soooo painful). =) But, I think I'll get a lot out of it. I have to conduct research on my own, which I have never done and this class, no matter how tedious and suicidal you want to become, is going to give me the steps to hopefully create a successful research proposal to submit to a journal. *We can only hope, right?*
Well, folks, that is my life right now, educationally speaking... Besides being a parent, which is the fun part of my day, the rest of the day constitutes these things. I have been holed up for the past two weeks and have no plans of going elsewhere... I guess a hole isn't quite the correct descrip... More like mesmorized by a computer screen and small print journal articles. Thank the higher powers for my baby... She keeps me laughing. Nothing like a poopy diaper to make you forget about all the inequality. =) Ok, definitely more than a poopy diaper. Everyone on here knows she is my everything, so get over it!